Tension Mounts Among Run Camp Leaders

WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO BUY YOUR STUFF?





Clearly miffed when they learned that Blaine and Bobbie Lam intended to open a new running apparel store on the same block as the specialty outlet which has dominated the running scene for the past quarter century, Chris Crowell and Rob Lillie Saturday barely spoke to their new competitors.

The Lams, taking up the space formerly occupied by the Dragon Inn, showcased some of their new wares at Run Camp Saturday, picking a perfect day to sport their new classy line of wool pants and cashmere tops.

"Would we have tried this if Chris hadn't suffered so long from Goofy Hat Syndrome?" asked Blaine. "No, but more importantly, we feel we're riding the wave of formality that is sweeping the fashion world. When people see how good they can look in Italian leather, they'll be asking themselves how they got sold that "bill of goods" that Rob likes to call the 'casual' look."

As one who doesn't like tension and friction, Bobbie Lam downplayed the Gazelle reaction to the soon-to-open store. "We're really doing them a favor," said Bobbie. "I'm not saying they were getting complacent or taking the running community for granted, but let's face it: we all believe in healthy competition. This will be good for them."

No date has been set for the opening of Cheetah.

Crowell didn't offer anything "on the record" regarding the new venture, but was overheard saying something to Tracy Cropsy's team about a "renegade store."

Renegades Dealt With Harshly

Angry, discouraged, injured, vengeful and disgruntled campers notwithstanding, we have found that the only blemish on an otherwise perfect record of community service provided by Run Camp has been the emergence of "renegade" camps. Beth, Bad and Beyond; Blizzard Cats; Mufflers -- to name a few. These groups, even though some claim their lineage pre-dates the existence of The One And Only True Run Camp (Borgess), were founded on the misguided, independent-minded notion that "we don't need them anymore," based on -- what else? -- the bonding formed at OUR camp.

Already in this, the 27th annual edition of Borgess Run Camp, there are signs -- bad signs -- that renegade camps are being forged through mid-week rendezvous. Bordering on the occult, with ghost-like, haunting images, these gatherings provide stories and folk lore that erodes the staid, orderly progression of Borgess Run Camp schedules and plans.

We have found that the only way to punish these renegades-to-be is to expose their wicked ways, publicly embarrass them with published photos of their activities, thereby discouraging the continued involvement is such unauthorized behavior.

We Get Letters

Q. Why does a man who ostensibly makes a living running a clothing store dress the way he does?
-- Les, from Miles City

A. Assuming you're referring to Chris Crowell, unfortunately Chris has long suffered from Goofy Hat Syndrome. He has undergone extensive treatment, and therapists believe this is a cure, but alas, Chris hasn't found it.

Q. I've been in Run Camp for four years and I have never missed the "Blessing of the Rodents," and yet I've heard nothing about that so far this year. What gives?
-- Mamie, from Hamtramck

A. This time-honored tradition in all likelihood will be held in Portage this year (Week 5 or 6), depending on the weather. The emergence of a full moon in Week 3, the timing of Lent and the initials of supporting actors who prove to be the early favorites in Academy Awards voting are the primary factors in the exact date and location.

Q. I thought I heard that 50 percent of what you wrote on the blog was true. Are we in for a big surge or truth or something?
-- Janna, from Hoboken

A. Yes and no.

Atlanta Airport Experiment Under Review

Moving Week Two of Borgess Run Camp to the William B. Hartsfield International Airport, while it had a number of advantages for camp organizers, appeared to be a disappointment to some campers. Others apparently were frustrated by what they called "undercommunication." Video from the Atlanta Camp experience has been folded into the tapes of SuperBowl plays which are under review by critics awaiting the next important sports moment, believed to be The Masters (if Tiger Woods plays).

"I think I made it clear all along," said Camp Organizer Blaine Lam, "that if you were looking for that perfectly run camp in which your every whim was catered to that this camp was not for you."

Lam, who admits that his trip to see his newly born grandchildren was "a factor" in the switch of Week Two activities from the Borgess Health & Fitness Center to Hartsfield-Jackson, rejected the notion that undercommunication was a problem. "I told Chris for heaven's sake, and I'm pretty sure I said something to Janeen." He said they were not only aware of the alternative site, but had the ultimate responsibility to pass the information along to coaches, team leaders and support personnel. "If I did such a bad job, why was the camp photographer there?" queried Lam. "I think it's possible, too, that we had some people who didn't understand that we would start in the South Terminal, not the North."

Lam also admitted that course logistics were something of a problem. "That, though, was not entirely my problem. I just didn't realize that the weekend travelers were that much less sophisticated than the type of business traveler you see on weekdays. And, OK, TSA Security personnel, once we started running were not as supportive as I thought they might be."

Lam, who spends much of the winter below the 35th Parallel, agreed to move Week Four of Run Camp from the scheduled Residence Inn in Shreveport, Louisiana, to downtown Austin, Texas, site of the Austin Half Marathon the next day. "I hope that makes the whiners happy," he said. He also agreed to have the Borgess Health & Fitness Center serve as an "alternate, backup, fill-in" site for people who choose not to travel to Austin.