Trouble Looms At Run Camp -- Vajgrt spun a yarn that could come back to hurt close-knit team

Borgess Run Camp organizers put on a happy face on opening day, but experienced campers sensed something was amiss, as details are just starting to surface that disaster could lurk on the horizon for the 13-week experience.

"For one thing, you could tell Chris was a little down," said camp veteran Shari LaBrenz of Chris Lampen-Crowell, who takes on the motivational duties for camp. "I mean, where was the FIRE UP, PEOPLE!!!"?

And, LaBrenz theorized that Lampen-Crowell's insistence that coach Dr. Mary Vajgrt "was not a runner" had a little bit of a hard edge. Dr. Vajgrt, as it turns out, may be a centerpiece in a political, legal scandal that could be full-blown trouble by Week 5.

"I think they're just pulling the wool over our eyes," said returning camper Chad Goodwille. "There's tension there. You can feel it."

Although unsubstantiated, there are unofficial reports that the Portage City Council is drafting a city ordinance banning sock puppets. City officials would neither confirm nor deny those reports, but an assistant city attorney, speaking in broad terms on the condition of anonymity said "the people of Portage are serious people, represented by serious government, and sock puppets are anything but serious."

"This is clearly targeting Run Camp," said Team Leader Sheila Clothier. "From what I've heard, it will only apply to organizations with more than 750 people. That means us, Sam's Club and a few churches, and let's face it, churches are not using sock puppets to make their point. At least I don't think they are."

Added Clothier: "It's grossly unfair, and we've been on pins and needles since we first got wind of it, but in a way I blame myself." Clothier admitted that when she was serving a one-week team leader suspension last year, her team members -- led by Dr. Vajgrt -- claimed to have transported her persona to camp through a sock puppet. "They'll say this is about sock puppets being trivial, but what they're really concerned about are the paranormal implications," said Clothier of the proposed ordinance.

Although Run Camp will only be in Portage two weeks this winter, a sock-puppet ban could have more major repercussions. Campers who would normally knit hats have no need to do so with the warm temperatures. Consequently, sock-puppet design kits are flying off the Gazelle shelves, so popular that New Balance is expected to launch a Good Form Knitting program.

Where will things go from here? "I think we'll know more if Chris is down again this week," said LaBrenz, "but I've also heard there's a lot of lobbying going on at Portage City Hall. This could get ugly."