The Borgess Run Camp's no-nonsense Disciplinary Action Team (DAT) brought down swift and firm justice this week, expelling three campers for being whiners.
"Who DAT?" asked one of the expelled campers, when told she was not only banned, but also prohibited from applying to return until 2014. One of the campers was expelled for complaining there was too much coaching and another was kicked out for complaining there wasn't enough coaching. The third was suspended for being a whining sympathizer, arguing that the other two were just offering constructive criticism.
"The road to whining is paved with good intentions," responded Tessa Emenheiser, acting chair of DAT. "Besides, we can handle the criticism. We really just have a problem with campers taking this stuff seriously. This isn't a military academy, although I must say, meting out discipline as if it were one is kind of fun."
In unrelated action, DAT placed a fourth camper on probation for questioning why Chris Lampen-Crowell would wear a plastic bunny around his neck for his 50-K run, and a fifth camper was suspended indefinitely for suggesting that the Disciplinary Action Committee was mean.
In other camp news, officials were scheduling the annual "Blessing of the Rodents" for Feb. 13. Customarily it is held the third Saturday of camp, though the technical date depends on the relationship between the Superbowl, Groundhog Day and Valentine's Day.
And, while camp leaders have relaxed rules about gang signs, informally they mark the transition into Phase II of camp, when idle minds, endorphins and social support creep into long-run discussions and post-run breakfast meetings. Gang signs should be reported to Bryon Bierema.
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